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12/30/2006 menstruationhad my period start this morning, well afternoon precisely, when i woke up
such good timing, end of the month, end of the year, just when i'm about to party! damn it!
and it was fucking extraordinarily painful this time, like i never experienced before
everybody talks about how annoying and cursing dysmenorrhea can be, all the cramps and waist-aches. but they never happened to me
i don't know what's wrong, maybe my messy diet and lifestyle since i came back, now i'm learning how much it takes to be a female
it hurts
it's making me just want to take this fucking womb out
for someone who is not planning on having any kid, guess it's no big deal, it's not the first time i imagine something like that anyway
on second thought i realise this pain-causing, pear-shaped object's function as a sex organ and my incretion regularor, i probably hang that idea for another while
12/7/2006 days of my holiday2nd week after i came back. i finished the whole 5 series of queer as folk and lost the only thing to do in my life. sure, i do love this series. not only am i attracted to those hot, exciting sexual scenes and the pretty faces of the gay characters but also educated by brian kinney's cruising strategies, which i can't wait to put into practice. desperated with the bore and funless, i really miss sydney a lot, the endless nights, flashing clubs and of course those lovely guys for me to stalk. hopefully with a little bit of effort, that won't be completely impossible. i do have plenty of ambitious plans ahead once i get back. like any beginning of a new year, it's always full of expectations and hopes, waiting to be fulfilled, and as always i tell myself they will be. i will somehow find myself a warming new home, get a new job, live another year and finally, lose my virginity. it is time. looking back on this year, i did have a couple of chances to give it over but it's only recently that the desicion was made. can't say that what happen to my best friend has no impact on me at all. it is also a feeling like to move on and experience the unexperienced, although that part of me will always remain deepest in the heart. |
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