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    8/31/2008

    fuck the truth

    “Hey, do you know why she deleted me from MSN?”

    “I don’t know. But how do you know that”

    “I have this program that allows me to see who has deleted or blocked me”

    “That’s creepy…but what kinda program is that? I wanna try it later too”

    In the end, I got the program but somehow couldn’t open it. It’s probably better this way, I think. Why would I wanna know who doesn’t like me and has been ignoring me. That’s gotta hurt! In fact why would anyone wanna know it?

    Surprisingly, people do. Even if they live in a life that appear to be perfect, they try their best to discover the “truth” behind it, risking the chance that the “truth” might not be as good and it could ruin the beautiful bubble you have. Are we stupid? Why are we so fascinated about the “truth” and disregard the sweet dream we are living now? After all, we as human beings, only have a few decades life. Beyond that, it’s a different story. It’s not really a long time, if you think about it. During this time, should we live in the real pain or fake happiness? Provided here “happiness” means physical and spiritual pleasure, why not! As journalists, one of most important our professional norms is to strike for the truth. But is it really that important? Especially when most of the time, the truth is the most devastating. I believe telling someone who is fully devoted in the dream that everything is just virtual and will vanish shortly as he wakes up is a very cruel thing, which makes no difference as to tell the patient that he’s got cancer and can only live 6 weeks. It takes all the joy away, immediately, which is why I think a lot of the times it’s not that people don’t know the truth, it’s that they don’t wanna know the truth, they’d rather continue their fancy little dream. If so, who are we to force them to face the truth? I personally don’t mind being lied to. Because if someone tells a lie, there is always a reason behind it. Either it would be good to me, or him. What’s the problem, as long as I never find out the fact that it is actually a lie. So if you lie to me, you better lie good.

    Only stupid people would come around and let the truth get on their nerve.

    8/28/2008

    the big M

    the good thing about working in maccas is that, there is always a high volume of customers, so you get to meet all kinds of people, couples, families, drunk, psychos, you name it and i've seen them. it could be a pain in the ass to deal with their unreasonable demands, but other times it was good fun to have a laugh at them too, cause they are such idiots haha.

    like tonight, i think it was because that they just raised the price of a lot of the product, i had an increasing number of queries about the bill. one of them just couldn't take the fact that yesterday he could spend less than $10 and have a luxury meal, today it just cost extra $2. after checking the order with me twice, the poor guys was simply devastated by the reality and had to ask to me hold his food for him to get back to his car and take that 2 extra dollars. the guy waiting behind him, had a nice smile and the clumsy way he acted when i handed over him the ice-cream was kinda cute. so i kinda had my eyes on him, until...i found that he didn't clean his own table after dining, then i say, forget it.

    then you have the couples coming in at 9pm for dinner or a snack. the way they talk to each other just seems so casual yet sweet. it makes me smile and wonder what it's like to have a company, speaking of which i have still completely no progress. simply because up until now, my social life basically maintained inactive. it is indeed annoying, but another thing is that school seems especially intensive this semester, whether or not as a result of me coming back a week later. i can't believe we are in 5th week already...geee stuffed by school and work i find myself hardly have any time or energy to pursue anything else. but still, i'm needing some "action" ;)

    8/26/2008

    another ordinary day

    today, I went to another open recruitment after university. the place is right opposite to coogee beach. great location, hopefully I'll get something out of it. wish me luck

    even if not, things are looking up, my friend. guess I've found myself back and got rid of the uncomfortable adjusting phase.

    can't wait for summer to start. I have so many plans!

    8/24/2008

    新的一章

    有段时间没有更新了吧,期间看到linxi同学和潘婷的不间断更新总有一种羡慕的感觉,觉得自己怎么就没有这个持之以恒的能力呢。hummm于是决定重新开张,开始新的一页。

    说起来,这个时机倒是挺好的,一穷二白,以后的任何事都算是值得记录的一笔吧。

    好了,从今天说起。终于完成了记录阿根廷之行点点滴滴的一个小短片。转眼半年了,算是对这次旅行的一次追忆吧,从侧面其实也说明了我对当前在悉尼的生活的不满。第一时间上传到youtube上,接着便招呼能想到的所有有关的朋友去捧场,呵呵,大家的赞扬还真是让我飘起来了呢。话说制作的过程,我就像又重新经历了一遍那些精彩刺激的冒险,于是便更加坚定了我毕业后转战南美的决心。有人有兴趣观摩的话,链接在这里http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBFB2xh8sr8

    新买的手机有拍照功能,不用特地背个照相机像个backpacker一样煞有介事的拍摄中人早已系以为然的景物,这大大提高了我用图片记录生活的兴趣(主要是我拿个手机,他也不知道我是在发短信还是在照相,恩,很好,很有隐蔽性)。

    DSC00028 学校门口的车站

    DSC00027 离家不远的火车站--说实话他总是让我想起小学的课文《小站》

    DSC00037 等车的时候闲着无聊照得公园,远处是玩橄榄球的小孩(天知道他们为什么会喜欢玩这么奇怪的球类运动)

    去超市买东西,明明没有多少,不知道为什么还是玩了很多钱,马的!

    晚上回来,终于给某个同学打了招呼,让他做我的job referee。说起来真是太丢脸了,找了这么多年的工作还是没找到,每次都还要麻烦人家~~~~真是难为情啊!所以老天,就保佑我找到一份称心的工作吧,不要再在麦当劳了!

    刚才称体重,56.3 yeah~~~~~减肥略有小成,不过我还没吃晚饭 :P

    好了现在去吃,灯下还要写法语 merde!

    5/26/2008

    我的幸福在哪里

    刚才看到一个女孩花7年时间到追得帖子,突然有感而发吧……
    发现自己已经不可能有这么大勇气去追求所谓的爱情了,自从那一次的疯狂以后,也不可能那么无所顾忌的去喜欢一个人了吧。也不知道这样是好还是不好。现在基本上的情况时,很容易的喜欢一个人,却有潜意识的不让自己先得过深,而避免受到伤害--我喜欢你,你看着办吧,行就行,不行就拉倒。我会抽身而去,并在走过场的伤心一下之后,很快得遗忘,then prepare myself to embrace the next story。然而,纵使小心翼翼,我也并不是抗拒再次开启那些炙热的感情,只是,很难再碰到能令我这么做的人了而已。but as i always say, if it happens, very nice, surprise me!
    回想起来,上一次感觉到这种冲动,是在BAs那个热闹不息的hostel里。只是尽管当初一样的迷恋,执著,仅仅四个月之后,我却已经对故事的主人公嗤之以鼻。这与6年的念念不忘是不一样的。也许下一次的感情会更经不起考验。可是现在更让我好奇的是,what/who will come along next。因为根据我对自己这近一年经历的回顾,我竟然发现,每隔一段时间,我的生活里就会出现新的目标,而且频率还蛮高的。所以我觉得担心没有感情宣泄的对象根本是多余的,还不如乘这段间歇期好好放松一下自己的神经,调整一下生活的重心,为下一个战役的到来作准备。说是战役,其实一点都不夸张,没有福气享受别人追求的我,注定要fight for my own happiness。可是,我却没有那样的勇气向那个女孩一样花7的的时间,承受期间的痛苦,挫折去那么的认定一个人,即使告诉我最后能修成正果也不行。那么,说与我的幸福究竟在哪里呢?在不远的将来,真得有一个人在等着我么?

    Ps.开始后悔在中学的时候没有大大方方的喜欢过一个人(貌似我现在也不行,总是扭扭捏捏的,我妈就这么说我),而现在一切都太晚了,我已经不再是原来的那个我,生活的也是一个完全不同的世界。作为一个外来者,我不太清楚这里的行为准则,又怎么在这个世界里寻找幸福。sometimes i wonder what if I'd stayed in china, would it be any easier...
    4/27/2008

    少年游

    Despite whether you like it or not, once you are somewhere on holidays, no matter how much you like it or how much time you are spending on it, sooner or later it’ll all come to an end. It is the time people wake up from their dream-like getaway and go back to their ordinary boring life in reality, lost, confused or reluctant. The only way to avoid it though, is to take on a holiday that is a lifetime long, dare you do it? Most of us realise the fact that we have quite limited time to be in this world, and therefore we are obligated to live it to the most extend. However in fact once we emerge ourselves in the society, we can’t help being dragged into this huge production machine, spending time and energy on things that seem to be but are actually not essential to us. The running of this machine is fast that we are left no time to think about what all of this mean to us, especially as individuals, in our limited life. Sometimes the notion that we are born in such beautiful planet and yet hardly get a chance to see its beauty makes me frustrated. Well considering it’s not such a easy probability to be born and even harder to be born again, I would hate myself if I wasted this precious opportunity. Fortune and fame are bullshit that in the end means nothing. And ordinary people, like us, are so powerless of the pursuit of powerful that if we don't try to get ourselves out of it, we are doomed to be used as the nameless numbers, maybe rounded, or kept a few digits after decimal point if we are lucky.

    Therefore I have decided to delicate myself to travelling, to the pursuit of love and beauty. As for those who question my motivation, I have no shame to admit that the beauty of humankind also attracts me and I long for it.

    So far on my itinerary are Europe, Thailand, South America and Africa. I give myself 10 years to complete this list, that is before I’m 30. After that, I have no way to presume, things may change, so is my perspective of life. I really hope I could spend a few days living in South America, like what I’m doing in Australia. Then I’d go to Africa with that special someone, of course if I couldn’t find this person, it’s quiet possible that I end up going by myself, which is also fine.

    2/25/2008

    insomnia

    2 in the morning, having to get up early next morning, i can't sleep anymore. this's wierd, with the sequela of jet lag i've been able to sleep and get up early lately. don't know why. maybe the pressure, the nervousness that i shall start the crazy shift in maccas again scares me. it is time to move on. i really need to find a new job and quit "working for the evils".

    unble to sleep, as usual the previous days in argentina flash back in my brain and inevitably make me feel bad, that i thought i belong more to there than in the queen blessed australia. it's been like a psychological disturbance, that i listen to argentine radios and try to speak spanish here, hypnotizing myself that i were still there. i think this is stupid. but i'm really trapped in the memories and unwilling to come back to reality.

    maybe that's the real reason why all the memories of holidays looks so good. it was like a utopia where people get to temporarily escape from the pressure of work and life and just purely concetrate on having fun. besides that, south america is a really good place to do it, good vibes, and biiiiiiiiig character. i long to relive those moments in my trip where you couldn't foresee what's waiting for you in the next corner of life, like that afternoon, on the aisle, the meet of eyes. i still can't figure out why i let certain things happen and not the other ones. but that's not something new to me, since my life has been a constant struggle of "what if". then again, the feeling of masochism makes me appreciate the regrets, like the aesthetics of imperfection that always gives you something to use your romantic imagination to speculate on. whatever it is, it can never hurt because you can never go back. we can wait for the future but the future is unknown.

    all of the words above come from the certain character i know, always alone and always quiet

    1/21/2008

    BAs travel journal--back to BAs

    cafe con leche y dos medianulas have becomethe rugular breakfast i got used to these days, in the sylish little bar next to the hostel with soft blue neo lights.
     
    more than 4 weeks, i have been in this city long enough to no longer care about the weekend activities in Palermo or the antique market right in front of the hostel on Calle Chile. so i got spare time to check out the city´s bookstores, music shops and even cinemas. guess they´d say a whole lot different things about the city´s vibe. with too much time in hand, people often start doings they wouldn´t normally do otherwise, just like the british kid travelled here on a ship with his impressively detailed journals and 400 pictures. but i guess this is just what holiday is all about--you get to slow down with your life, so that you can observe and discover the things that are normally neglected.
     
    me, myself, driven by this nature, has learnt to spend sunny afternnons in any comfortable, elegant cafe (because i can afford it here), just to watch the world gones by and the people watching me; after cooking together with the guys in the poorly equiped ketchen, have a chat with them; and, the hell, i have even started reading the english novel i picked up from the shelf of the hostel. it´s quite entertaining actually, which is why i keep reading it. it tells a growing-up story about a tough, intelligent gay woman fight her way to success in the 60s. apart from the funny witty lines, the sexually description was pretty intense and made me blust and leads me to the curiosity of making out with a woman. then i thought it was dangerous, so i decided to re-direct it towards man and went out with the gang last night to a salsa place.
     
    it was funny. firstly i don´t dance this shit, and once you are there you had to pair up with someone because everyone else is. but it wasn´t much of a problem for me because all these years clubbing in sydney, i know that i dance good, it wasn´t so difficult if you just imitate someone else´s steps; and i know i´m reasonably hot, so it wasn´t much of waiting until somebody grabbed my hand and pulled me to dance. half way through in the dance floor, i discvered that men who can dance can be really sexy. i used to think they were gay but they can be straight and very sexy, if they know how to shake their things. plus if they have a deeply carved latino face and well-rounded body, it would definately be a killer. but the thing is that, they could easily be handsome but not many of them have muscline shape to go with. maybe just recovering economy hasn´t spare much time for them to worry about their 6 packs and going to the gym, like australian men do. some of them even got tummies. i hate to see cute 20 something guys with tummies, spoils everything! but all in all i found this guy, reasonably cute, dance beautifully and because of that, has a better-than-average body. i couldn´t get my eyes off him. i felt the impluse inside of me every time he spins. too bad he´s got a partner and i was too ashamed of my salsa skills. the guys in our group were good dancers too (they are all latinos, so it´s probably natural). but they are all too old, except for a few. one of them was a brazilan guy. i could have hooked up with him, because i could feel that he was like all over me when we were sitting there, and when everyone else was leaving he offered to stay out with me if i wanted. why not, i didn´t play a bit with this little cutie. but worst of the worst, there was one other guy that stayed. being older and more agressive, he tried to keep me with him all the time. the most disgusting thing was that he´s already got a girlfriend and we even hanged out together once. i didn´t really wanna play with him. it was an awkward triangle. none of us got what we wanted. so we headed back to the hostel shortly after. well fuck it! at least nowi don´t need to face the embarrassment of making out with hostel mates. 3 more weks here, i´m sure there will be more coming up ;)
    12/28/2007

    BA travel journal--arriving in iguazu

    almost 20 hours, definately the longest bus trip in my life--terrible! worst feeling ever! every second passed io hope the bus was going to stop. i threw out twice in the most disgusting toilet (you dont want me to describe it). swose to myself that coming here by bus with the german was the worst idea ever--higher than usual bus ticket, no camera recharger (still), stupid guy didnt wanna reserve the hostel first, so we ended up in a fairly expensive one...
     
    but now, i am sitting in one of those "hang beds" (what you call that?) in the yard of the hostel, in betwen big exotic tropical trees that i have no idea what the names are, and the mysterious sounds of the nature mixing birds and bugs. breathing the air just washed by the rain, i am happy that i am here.
     
    puetro iguazu is a small touristic vallage located at the boarder of argentina and brazil. surrounded by the jungle, this is the passway to the famous iguazu waterfall. all the tourists come here, sattle down, relax themselves a little in the vallage's quietness and natural environment, which is completely different from the feeling in buenos aires, then, march to the jungle! there is no big buildings here, all the shops are simple designed, so simple that i sometimes question the quality of the products displayed (i duno if its neccesary). the streets are red because of the typical soil in argentina and covered by cabble stones which give a special dash of oldness. with the car parking on the sideway playing some spanish folksongs, you feel like in one of the music videos (if you know what i mean).
     
    ps, yesterday, to treat myself after the painful trip, i had dinner in a fairly stylish restuarant. the meal was a little expensive but i believe i had the best table bread ever! served with some special paste, which i think is made of livers. too bad i had no camera to take a pic of it...and the fried banana was nice too :D
    12/24/2007

    BA travel journal--life crossovers

    23/12/07
    this morning, at breakfast people were sitting there, talking abouthow the world is so small that you could just randomly run into anyone at anytime. i looked out of the windows, thinking how amazing this randomness could be and what surprise it would bring to our life...
     
    2nd day, since i moved into this new hostel, i was worried about going back to the initial situation again, knowing practically nobody. that afternoon, coming back from class, or dinner (whatever it is), i was in the dorm, about to go out. at the door, in front of my face, i met those hazel eyes, deep and shining brightly. for a moment, i was completely caught in them. coming back to my senses, i found out that, they belong to an equally beautiful face. the boy was not very tall but in fairly good shape. nervous and surprised, "are you living here?" is the thing that came out of my mouths. he smile, shyly and walked into the dorm, sitting in a bed. then i realised there is another guy behind him. we started talking, but the boy just laid quietly in his bed.
     
    the next day, at the breakfast, i saw him again, in black pants and shirts, the hair making perfect curves over his eyes. he walked into the door, with the same shy look (which later i discovered was almost identical to him). so i gave him a smile and he came to sit down beside me. as usual, he was a good audience, making no comment while me and the other guy were talking. it was only after the guy left we couldfinally have a conversation, from which i got to know a little bit more behind the pretty face: he is only 18, from a small town in chile, just finished high school and wanted to study film in buenos aires. it was a very nice talk, for the reason that we both share the same interest, but also for the reason that i felt so comfortable talking with him. he talks slow but with unexpected humor and  very soft and deep voice, which has the power to calm you down. that is probably how we became friends.
     
    at night i didnt see him come back. the other guy said he moved out. i suddenly felt disappointed. but in the end, he showed up again, which led to other encounters bwteen us.
     
    the 2nd time we hang out together was the last dinner with bia. i casually asked him if he wanted to join and he easily agreed. again, he was very quietfirst meeting bia. but it did not took long until we all started joking with each other. the restaurant we went was not very near to our hostel but with his little map and oraientation we did not have much trouble looking for the right location. he is also extremely gentel, always letting me and bia go first and holding the doors for us. i guess it´s just not common for a 18 year old nowadays. the dinner was great, i felt like the time could not be better. i had a cute boy and a good friend beside me, what more could i ask for? the place was crowded, dark and hot, with the little light of the candle i could see that he was sweating. he found me staring at him, so he grinned back, blinking his eyes.
     
    after that, we went back to the hostel, i thought everybody would be sleeping already but surprisingly when we arrived we found the door was lucked and everyone was out. so it gave us a chance to spend sometime alone, which i really loved. we talked for 4 hours, about everyting, familym life perspectives, religion, political believes etc...we did actually have similair takes on a lot of the issues. he admited that he is a slow type of person who would rather sit back and observe. it is a little weird to a 18 year old but i liked it. guess that´s why im attracted to him. i like it when he is quiet with other people but could joke and talk a lot when it is just me and him around. at the same time, he was a lot of ideas, and ambitions. i hope that we could be just like that forever. but pretty soon, the other guys came back and checked the clock, it was 4:30am.
     
    yesterday was the last day we spent together. i would really love to spend the whole day just with him. but unfortunately i had to go to the bus station with this german guy to buy the ticket for my next trip. so i told him to meet me at the hostel at 5pm to help me buy the camera recharger. it was part of the reason but also because we just wanted to hang out with him before he leaves. at 5, he came to the hostel right in time, so there we were, wondering on florida, the major shopping street in BA. we were in no luck, but he was a good company, talking walking.i liked when he was sophsticated, sometimes a little naughty. even if we were not talking, there was no pressure. we had dinner together in a chinese buffet. good meal, i had a little beer, to warm myself up but also to get drunk a little, in case i got attempted to do something crazy (when i look at him, i cant help notice his beautifully shaped lips and sexy collarbones :P, which made me wanna do something evil). but i didnt in the end. he was too innocent, i didnt wanna take the risk of ruining everything. it was just right between us. after the meal, we were about to go to a street show, but it got too cold that i decided to take a taxi to the hostel. there he showed me his magical machenical camera, which did not need any battery to operate, and was as special and as sophsitcated as him. i took a pic of him, sitting in the bed of the hostel. he said he would send it back to me.
     
    at night, i laid in my bed, thinking that it would be our last night together, so last chance to ever say something. in the end, i typed something in the mobile, and showed it to him. in the dark, i saw the light of the mobile phone, hearing the sound of him typing and my heart beating. it was nothing surprising yet everything sweet.
     
    this morning i did not wanna get up, knowing that i would wake up and find that bed empty. but to my surprise, when i opened my eyes, he was still there. sleeping in? why did i have to see him again? makes everything harder! then he got up, packing his bag, saying nothing. and i didnt say anything either, just stayed in my bed, watching him, until he finished packing up everything. he walked to me, waving goodbyes, i waved back to him and watched him turn back, walk out and disappear.
     
    i felt so lost, the same horrible feeling i had 2 years ago has come back--to miss someone less than 1 hour after he left. i was going to the street market today. but im just not in the mood. instead, i spent the whole day writing everything down, so that i dont lose them. they are too much, too precious. i try too hard to carve everything in my head as possible, the face, the smile, the voice....  
     
     
    12/21/2007

    argentina travel journal

    20/12/07
     
    ok, so i lost the camera recharger. i have been down for it for long enough. this morning i suddenly had this realisation that i am only here for 2 months, and probably will not come back my whole life. so i have to record everything, even if it will cast extra $50.
     
    i also starterd enjoying my life as a backpacker who doesnt even speak local language. the people here are very nice. they are the type of people that would offer help without you even asking, especially when i stood in the street corner looking lost and helpless.
     
    i have met all those people from different places too. althougfh they cant accompany me in the trip for long. meeting and talking to them have definately made my time here much more colorful. everyone has their stories, perspectives and culture, which are really fascinating to know.
     
    maybe i really were too much concerned before. what am i doing here? holiday! travelling! it is time to start enjoying it!
    10/13/2007

    First Concert in My Life--Good Charlotte

    it's was reaaaally awesome

    he almost wore me out

    --somebody wore you out?

    --i said almost

    9/18/2007

    你不知道什么时候叶子会变黄,什么时候婴儿会长出第一颗牙,什么时候会爱上一个人...

    This should be an end

    今天,赵倩同学终于信守承诺,帮我去问了小帅哥的个人情况。“yes, I do”,意料中的答案,算是了了一桩心愿吧,从此就不用那么纠结了。

    下午的时候,按照计划去上课,可是他却迟迟得没有来,心中有些忐忑,于是就不自主地向门口张望,期待着,那个熟悉的身影。白净的体恤,水洗的牛仔裤,他就那样走进了教室,走到最后一排,安静的坐了下来。偷偷瞄了一眼,在不敢多看,生怕慌乱的眼神会出卖自己。低头给赵倩发了短信,一切已就绪。无心听课,假装不经意的回头,看到他专注的样子。

    下课后,看到赵倩已等在门口,飞一样的冲向图书馆,在那里等待一个我早已知道的答案。

    也许是有准备的原因吧,竟没有想象中的伤心,失落,只是后悔没有在一旁偷看他的反应。呵呵,应该很可爱吧。

    “倒退三步”,听到问题后又意料之中似的“一脸坦然地”回答。我不厚道的就这么把Diego同学设计到了我导演的校园drama之中。

    最后一节课,和赵倩鬼使神差的逃了,却不知前方转角,命运和我们开了个小小的玩笑。

    “你说他应该不知道是我吧”

    “多少肯定能猜到一点,你就祈祷我们俩在一起不要被他看到”

    条件反射的一抬头,看到那张令我心动不已的脸,正迎而来。

    “啊!”我惊得叫出声来,脑袋里一片空白,下意识的掉头,绕了个圈,逃开了,却狼狈不堪。

    “你说他又没有看到我啊?”

    “你叫那么大声,想不看到都难”

    “那他现在一定知道是我了”

    “本来你就这么走过去,也就算了,大家是熟人。你现在反应这么大,不肯定知道是你了”

    “噢,那我以后再也不要去上french tutorial了”

    “你就给你们tutor说你要打工,要调tutorial时间,然后他被你吓着了,也去调,结果你们俩又换到一起去了,哈哈……”

    那也太神奇了吧。不过说实话,以前真的没有在课堂以外的地方看到过他,还以为他上完课就人间蒸发了呢。没想到第一次碰见,居然是在这种情况下,还真是丢脸啊!不过每天上课又要看到他,希望不会太尴尬。嗯,就不去看他,坐得远远的。

    不过话说回来,还是很enjoy这种纯纯的暗恋的感觉,好像又回到了高中的时候,仅仅是一个背影就能为之兴奋(凌希知道我在说什么吧)。上课的时候,时不时的偷偷的看他,成了我最大的乐趣,清秀的脸庞,专注的眼神,说话时轻柔羞涩的神态……

    说起来,他应该是我除了某人之外第二个动心的人,虽然一共都没有说过几句话。不过可以肯定,既然已经有了gf,一定是一个nice, gentle bf。可惜的是,对象不是我。所谓的,还没开始就以结束吧。

    老套一点,还是要祝福他们,希望他gf不要欺负他too hard,哈哈~~~

    9/9/2007

    共产共夫,真的可以么?

    if love is no longer affordable

    and sex only happens to fill our empty heart

    then baby

     would you like to share a man with me

    8/19/2007

    single vs couple

    这个世界上应该有这样一种体系,把single的我们和已经是名花(草)有主的他们区分开来,这样我们就不会无谓地对不该有感觉的人有感觉了。

    Diego同学原来已经有girlfriend了啊,真是不甘心,那么腼腆可爱一小孩,枉费我暗恋他整整一个学期啊!现在要怎么办呢,总不能插脚做小三吧,太不厚到了,况且我也没那个实力跟信心。唉,有缘无份啊。暂时的计划是,继续何其套近乎,建立好同学朋友关系,待到学期结束时~~~再说吧。在不济,已放假也看不到人了,不会太丢脸,何况了了一桩心事,以方便我在argentina大展拳脚哈。恩,就这样了。

    Ps今天是七夕,却偶然得知某人在芬兰有艳遇的消息。虽然不在深陷其中了,可还是有点小失落哈。唯一的办法就是,在这里好好加油,不能输给他了(since when it's become a race?)!!!

    8/3/2007

    proposed conversation

    Me: hi, my name is Xiaojing. we were in the same tutorial group last semester remember?
    D:.....
    Me: do you nomrally go to lectures?
    D: ya...
    Me: oh great. could you do me a favour? i'm having this clash , cannot make it to the  lectures. would you be able to help me go over some of the sutff together?
    D: errr...sure
    Me: thank you! when do you have time this week? maybe we can meet up for an hour or so
    D:...
    Me: how about tomorrow, before the tut? i'll see you in front of carslaw, ok?
    D: ohh ok
    7/24/2007

    Day Three-Four—Theme Parks

    We got up relatively early the next morning, so did most of our other dorm mates. Living in a mixed 12 people dorm meant a line-up to use the bathroom, but also a chance to watch guys with only their undies :P I was thrilled at the first. But then later when I saw the large number of topless guys on the beach I realised that they probably just didn't care showing one or two pieces of their muscles. Anyway I quite enjoyed my view there.

    After a pretty simple breakfast (I don’t even remember what I ate), we went to the bus stop not far from our hostel. It was only 10am and there were already a lot of people waiting. The main bus at the stop was a theme park express, going to both movie world and dream world. We were heading to movie world today, and apparently most of the people around had the same destination. The bus didn’t let us wait long, and there were two of them coming at once. I guess it was just to make sure everybody could get on board. There was one thing interesting about Queensland’s transport system, that is until you actually get on the bus you can buy your ticket from the driver, before that you can hardly buy any pre-paid ticket elsewhere (there is probably somewhere you can get it but really rare, I didn’t see it). So the getting-on-board section was extremely long at every stop with a lot of drama. Still me and panpan was pretty excited, thinking that we could finally get student concession here legitimately (NSW and Victoria are the only two states where internationally students don’t get their concession rights). And we got it, until next time panpan accidentally showed her student card to a bus driver (I don’t even know why she did it), and we were told that the concession discount is only to students enrolled in a Queensland institution. How unfair!

    Most of the theme parks in gold coast are located in the same area, to the north shore, proximately 45 minutes drive from surfers paradise. When the bus got to movie world, 3/4 of the passengers took off, including us. In front of the big gate, we had a preview of our day, huge queues lining to get in. there we also saw a few student groups from china. Panpan stood with them unconsciously, but I found out that with our pre-paid ticket, we could just get in from the express entry. That saved us quite a bit of time. It was such a fancy world inside. 整个公园的布局模仿19世纪的美国小镇,被划分成几个不多的区域,每个区域及不同的电影为主题。进门的左手边就是batman的地盘,入口处还有个大哥cosplay batman的样子和游客合影。我们都觉得muscle

    样子实在是太傻了,所以就没有去,不过倒是觉得他的工作就是每天和人照照像啊什么的,很轻松。后来还在scooby island看到一个cosplay scooby doo的,那个男的sb的和电影里面一模一样,超级搞笑。想来应该和他合影的,可惜错过了。我们在公园里从早上11点多,一直待到下午差不多5点关门,大部分的时间都用来排队了,几乎每个项目前面都是弯弯曲曲的长龙。坐scooby island ride的时候,门口倒是一个人都没有,我们还纳闷怎么回事呢,结果进去一看,一屋子的人,等了差不多有一个小时。还在有panpan在旁边,我们就以点评旁边的帅哥为乐,确切地说,因该是帅弟弟,因为都是小孩子居多。不过最后,这个ride的还是挺好玩的,坐着一个像是室内过山车的东西,穿梭在电影里party island的那个山洞的场景里,加上声光效果,还有向后移动的部分,真的是非常的过瘾。我们就在整个过程中不停得尖叫,啊啊啊啊啊啊~~~呵呵。说实话,虽然排队的时间很长,但基本上大多数项目到最后都让我们觉得是值得的。除了我们已开始排错了队,本来是想去玩一个类似于mini roller coaster的东西先warm up一下,结果进去后才发现是一个bunny兔子的一个什么幼稚trip,难怪刚才排队的时候感觉跟进了幼儿园时的,浪费我的时间!后来还玩了一个超级大的,从假山上冲到水的项目,忘了主题是什么电影,场景使美国西部的感觉。弄得全身都湿了,却很开心。还看了一场shrek篇外篇的4D电影,第一次,要带那种特殊的眼镜,感觉挺新奇的。介绍的工作人员也很cheerful and funny的感觉,每天接待那么多批游客,还要保持这样的心态,真是不简单。电影开始以后,看到的人物真的好像从屏幕上走下来了一样,超级立体的感觉,而且离你那么近,搞得我旁边的大叔总忍不住想要伸手去抓那些人物,结果当然是什么也抓不到。故事情节好像是说Fiona公主又被被大龙吃掉的邪恶国王的鬼魂给抓走了,想要把她也给弄死,好和她在阴间做鬼夫妻(好像恐怖片啊),然后shrek and donkey一起去营救她。结果当然是Fiona获救,邪恶的国王永世不得超生。有趣的是,在电影里shrek骑马车追赶Fiona的时候,我们的座椅也会模拟马车上的感觉,有节奏的震动,而当donkey打喷嚏的时候,我们身上也会被喷到他的口水(有点恶心),这大概就是身临其境的感觉吧。在整个公园里玩得最过瘾的一个,是一个叫做superman escaperoller coaster,据介绍说整个过程中会体验到4个正G1个负G的重力,这大概就是被superman推着走的感觉吧。Panpan自己不敢坐着个,倒是很热心的怂恿我去坐,一番思想斗争之后,我终于决定去排队。等待的过程漫长又紧张,电视屏幕上滚动播放的安全提示更加让我觉得恐怖,周围的人都三三两两的谈笑着,中间不乏刚过12安全的小孩,真是让我觉得后生可畏啊。我一个人忐忑得站在那里,手掌心不停得冒汗。终于轮到我了,前面的一对是3个人,所以排出来一个和我一起,我看他们都30多岁,挺成熟的样子,心里稍微有了点底,问他们之前又没有坐过roller coaster,他们说没有,我又一点底都没有了。绑安全带的时候,我做是觉得压得不够紧,检查再三,生怕在半空中松了,把我给甩出去。开始发动,车厢还没出站,正缓缓的加速,周围就一片鬼哭狼嚎,我被大家带动,再加上本来心里也就害怕的得不得了,也没心没肺的嚎了起来。车子上了第一个斜坡后,开始全速向前冲,我不敢睁开眼睛,就听见风猛烈的吹着,还有车轮呼啸的声音。身体在车上被甩来甩去,要不是有东西挡着,早就不知道飞到哪里去了,内脏也是一阵一阵麻麻的,感觉自己要死了,更是撕心裂肺的尖叫,一直到车停了,我还没停。到站的时候,安全带的锁扣怎么也打不开,吓死我了,还以为要被定在上面再转一圈。好在工作人员过来帮了我,说实话,刚出来的时候脚是软的,走路摇摇晃晃,中心不稳。不过见了panpan我还是给她说,这没什么。也是,一共也就那么一眨眼的事。从这以后,我在坐什么roller coaster都是小菜了。这个时我今天作大的收获,以至于晚上会去睡觉的时候都觉得床老是晃来晃去的。

     

    第二天,又是早起,去了sea world。这次虽然我们有pre-paid ticket,还是要和大家一起排队进门。这里有必要说一下,以前大家一直说,外国人素质怎么搞,怎么遵守纪律,怎么不插队,这天我们的队就被几个黄毛的给插了,不过这回是我们素质比较高,没跟他们计较。不同于movie world, sea world是一个以观赏为主的主题公园,虽然也有一些rides,但和其他公园比起来就相当小儿科了。一进门就看到一个超大的人工湖,估计是坐水上表演用的。Panpan建议去做一个类似于观光缆车的东西,于是又去排队,好在不是很长。坐在上面的感觉还蛮惬意的,景色很好,就在到中间的时候晃来晃去的,有点吓人。和这差不多的,后来我们还坐了一个叫做sea world eye的东西,在上边可以差不多看到整个gold coast的海岸线。不过就是在上面挂的时间太久了,加上太阳又晒得厉害,我们心里就想,“怎么还不放我们下来啊”。公园里值得看得有shark Bay,一个很大的水族馆,可以从陆上和水里两个角度观赏各种鱼儿,包括鲨鱼,小丑鱼(nemo),扁鱼,还有一些叫不出名字的五颜六色的鱼类,以及珊瑚,海星,海葵等其他海洋生物。我最喜欢的是在触摸区,你可以真正用手去感觉这些神奇的生物,虽然在panpan看了有些恶心。在深水区,提供潜水的娱乐项目,我虽然很想去,可是因为没带泳衣,而且也不会游泳,所以只好作罢,留到下次吧。水池里的水,蓝蓝的泛着波光,看上去不过几米深,但是当我们走到水下时,才发现原来至少有十米深。看似飘在水面上的水草,事实上是扎根在水底的海底森林,幽幽的给人神秘的感觉。从shark bay往前走,是另一片水域,岸边是块绿地,在这里我们终于看到了传说中聪明的海豚。和之前看到的其它鱼类不同,这里的两三只海豚独自占有一整片水域,没有别的鱼和他们玩,他们就自己自娱自乐,一会儿跃出水面,一会儿又扎进水里,可爱极了。我心里对海豚一直有一种特殊的喜好,觉得他们实在是聪明伶俐的动物,再加上嘴角天生的弧线,感觉好像一直在微笑一样,给人很友善的感觉。于是在那里很他们照了好几张相,本来还有苗燕可以看的,貌似好像还使这里的招牌节目。可是后来去做什么海盗船,给错过了,真是欲哭无泪啊。今天在sea world的另一大收获时看到了活的北极熊,却是见面不如闻名。大概是被人硬是从北极拉到这儿来,很不适应吧,一身毛都是黄色的,呆在那里动也不动一下,哼也不哼一声,搞得大家都很扫兴。和旁边小卖部里出售的雪白的,憨态可掬的玩具比起来都要逊色很多。唯一的一场表演,我们看到的,是海豹,不知道是不是为了应景pirate 4,弄成海盗的样子,还ok。看完表演,我们早早的也就回家了。明天开始,休整一下,向night clubs进发! 

    7/19/2007

    Day Two—getting around

    刚躺下没多久,同屋的各位陆续起床了。睡眼朦胧中隐约听到,一群人操着不知是欧洲哪个国家的语言在聊天,时不时地还挤出两句英文,努力地想和另外一个貌似是从New Zealand来的男生交流,内容还像是关于他们前一天晚上在clubpickup的情况。我也不知道我怎么能在当时如此困倦的情况下,还能有精力来分析他们的谈话内容,而且我还寻思着,当初我在Sydneyclubpick up backpacker的时候,他们回来又没有也没床头小会上把我讨论一番,呵呵。好在他们一帮人聊了没多久就各自出门了,我才又静下心来,继续睡觉。这一觉便睡到了下午,我们竟然被gold coast白天热辣的阳光给晒醒了。索性起床,洗漱一番之后, 正式开始explore这个陌生的城市。

    因为有昨天一晚和今天早上在街上闲逛的基础,我们对附近的街道已经有了一定的了解,于是出了门就直奔市中心的旅游区。Gold coast是一座不折不扣的旅游城市,离main beach不远的旅游区也就是最热闹的市区,而我们的住处也只有10分钟的步程。白天的街道照耀在海滨明晃晃的阳光下,比晚上更多了几分生气。街上到处是带着太阳镜,传着花裤衩和裙子,踩着拖鞋,悠闲度假的人们。也有很多刚刚着陆,提着大包小包,满脸迷惑的backpacker。空气里弥漫着从海水里吹来的淡淡的腥味,以及时不时从面前飘过的各种香水和古龙水的味道。路边是各式各样卖旅游纪念品的小店,和Sydney的没什么太大不同,所以也就没能引起我们太多的注意。倒是无意间发现了一家卖打折theme park link ticket的店,当下买了两张movie world and sea world的联票,这样一来明后两天也就有事干了。Gold coast 作为旅游城市,吸引人的除了美丽的沙滩以外,最著名的还有各种主题公园,from attractions, experiences, to all kinds of thrill rides。我们来的季节不对,不然可以去那些水上公园,也是很有趣的。

    走着走着,肚子就饿了。于是我们来到一家貌似粤式的饭店,从节约角度考虑,点了一菜一汤,外加两碗米饭。结果上菜的时候,surprise, surprise,我们有幸见到了世界上最小碗的酸辣汤,是成在拳头大的盅里的。不过,倒是挺稠,跟羹似的,料也很全。我们开玩笑是酸辣汤的syrup。就着这碗汤,和一份甜的厚人的梅菜扣肉(当时突然想吃肉),我们解决了两碗饭。吃得还算饱,就是不得不感叹gold coast的物价啊,还真是具有欺骗性。酒足饭饱,不觉得又困了。于是打道回府,早早的又上了床,养精蓄锐,明天一早开始我们的theme park之旅。

    7/18/2007

    gold coast 游记

    2周的时间在不停的抱怨和计划中悄然无息的过去,留在记忆中的是surfers paradise 晴朗的天空,湛蓝的海水,灿烂的阳光,还有少年青春逼人的背影……

     

    Day One

    下午的时候,panpan来到我家帮我整理行李。本着一切从简的原则,两周的行程我却只带了个背包,里面装了些换洗的夏装。由于天气没有想象中那么summer,特意买的小bikini被丢在了家中,这让我很是遗憾了一下。在一番checkdouble check 之后,跟Angela告别,我们便意气风发的哼着“走四方”,踏上了征程。

    搭车来到Sydney domestic airport,虽然就在几乎是每年必经的international airport旁边,这确实我们第一次来这里。感觉远没有international的热闹,却很是high-tech,需要自己在电脑上check-in。之前没有用过的原因,这让我们惊叹了很久。然后就是漫长的,等待登机的过程。不同于international airport,有各国帅哥从眼前飘过以供娱乐,domestic的候机厅里不知道是不是冬令营还是什么的,全是追来跑去的小孩子和teenagers。从某种意义上来讲,这也为我们旅途中后来的种种遭遇买下了伏笔。

    晚上9点钟登机,飞机在升空90分钟后落在了gold coast机场。满怀兴奋的,我们下了飞机,却发现迎接我们的是和Sydney相差无几的寒冷,这让我们多少有点失望,不过好在穿的够暖,也就没有多大问题。如果说Sydney domestic airport简单的话,这里的airport就是和train station差不多。我们在转了两圈以后,依然只发现了bank of Queenslandatm。而事实是,在后面的日子里我根本就没有在gold coast市内发现St George atm,不知道是他们市场推广有问题还是怎么的。除了机场,我们眼前一摸黑,脑子里也是一样。因为没有事前定好住的地方,我们也不知道要往哪里去。经过一番讨论,并在征询了information centre小姐的意见之后,我们决定先坐车去surfers paradise,碰运气看看还有没有开门的backpacker’s18块钱的车票,让我们很有被宰的感觉,不过路程好像还满远的,我们又觉得值得。只是这个路九曲八弯,搞得我们两个晕车的人都快吐出来了。在一个十字路口,我们被丢了下来,告知多数backpacker’s都在附近。下了车,像面对人生中无数其他十字路口一样,我们失去了方向,不知道要往哪一边走才好。最后我们决定弃暗投明,往灯火最明亮的地方走去。这在时候被证明是个方向性错误,因为那片灯火通明的地方是闹市区,where all the nightclubs are,而并非住家的地方(在Sydney这两片是混在一起的)。在光明中寻找不到希望,我们便义无反顾地投向了黑暗。终于看到了几家backpacker’scheck-in却都已经关了。真是流年不利啊。骂娘肯定是要的,不过没什么实际用处。冷静下来,分析一下当前的形势,最可行的方案是先喂保已经抗议很久了的肚子,再找家internet cafe spend the night. 现在这个时间段,营业的餐饮业就只有土耳其大叔们的kebab了。我们找了间街角的小店,每人要了个chicken kebab。事实证明,这里的物价并不像传说中的比Sydney便宜,最多只是持平而已。Saturday night,街上到处是打扮得花枝招展,醉眼迷离的男男女女,从各个方向往clubs进发。我们知道,过不了多久,我们也会是他们中的一员,只是当前先找个地方落脚的迫切需要不允许我们想太多的灯红酒绿。啃完了整个kebab,我们回到之前看到的一家overnight internet cafe,开始了在gold coast的第一个漫漫长夜。

    在最后一秒找accommodation 是一件十分困难的事,在最后一秒找budget accommodation,就是难上加难。这里要特别感谢Angela and Darcy,在我们最困难的时候伸出了援助之手,帮我们出谋献策。几经比较权衡之后,我们所订了一家叫做“backpackers in paradise”的hostel,这里也就成了我们今后两周的大本营。因为经济原因,我们选择了12人男女混合的房间,机缘巧合的注定了我们会经历一些人和事,又错过另一些。因为要提前48小时预订,我们的床位事实上是后天才会有,但是抱着侥幸的心理,我们还是决定天一亮就去reception check in,希望有空余的床位。住宿的大事解决了,我们心里也轻松了很多。看看时间,早上5点多,忽然心血来潮的想到要去看日出,于是带着大包小包,迎着早晨清冷的海风向海边走去。这其实是因祸得福,如果不是整晚都没有睡,我们是不可能有闲情这么大早特意起床看日出的。在这两周里,我们的平均起床时间是下午2点左右。到了beach,远方还只有一点点地微红,看来里日出还有一段时间,我们便去了不远处的macca’s。有人说macca’s其实是房地产商,不管在哪里都占据最黄金的地段,真的是这样,这家店也就在beach街对面。进了macca’s就好像回家一样,店里正在做openpanpan就说要不要去帮他们,我鄙视的看了她一眼。买了个bacon and egg mcmuffin meal,我没怎么吃过macca’sbreakfast系列,说实话,还真是难吃!跟rubber似的,不过好歹店里面是暖的。等啊等,等到6点多,我们又重新回到beach。这时候,空旷的沙滩上多出了几个身影,不知道是起的大早,还是像我们一样整夜没有睡。海鸥三三两两飞飞降降,映着远处隐隐的橘黄色的光辉,还是很有感觉的。我和panpan开玩笑说,这么浪漫的场景,身边怎么是你啊。没办法,谁叫咱没男人呢,凑合凑合吧。说话间,海平线上出现了半个闪着耀眼光芒的圆,海水也被照得泛起了金光,闪的人不能直视。做为中国人,我们很专业的拿出照相机,开始拍照。排着拍着,就见那圆一点点地往上升……(详情见课文《海上日出》)还真的事很漂亮,一扫我们整夜没睡觉的郁闷。和我们一起有幸欣赏着美丽景象的,有晨跑的大叔和他的大狗,有静静的坐在沙子上不知从哪里来的孤单的小帅哥,有何我们一样还背着backpack的女生,还有勤劳的一大早就来上班的beach lifeguards,生机勃勃的一天,在gold coast 就这么开始了。Backpacker’sreception 9店才开,我们就去超市转了一圈。回来的时候,竟然看到马拉松比赛,参加的人各种肤色,年龄都有,真是然我们感叹,还真是运动啊!而这时我们最想做的,就是抱个枕头,呼呼大睡。终于熬到9点,去reception check in 果真还有空位,谢天谢地!交了钱之后,飞奔回房间,终于可以睡觉了!